Hurrah Dish

Chapter III

Portrait of Nicolas Trigault in Chinese Costume ¹

When European missionaries arrived in China at the end of the 16th century, they found people interested in science (so that the missionaries were accepted in China because of their scientific knowledge) but unaware of their own past in mathematics.

— "East Asian mathematics". Encyclopedia Britannica ²

By the end of the 16th century many great works of thought had been purposefully and psychotically buried in permafrost — some of the best works those that would have had difficulty being popularized throughout China before being hit with heavy ice layers — a practice that had been going on for many centuries leading up.  

The dictating forces of East Asia decided they'd prefer to continue with inverse-civilization — even if it meant stagnation or societal decline — than free the civilized forces that could have driven stable progress and innovation.³ As a result, many of the Chinese "people" the Europeans ran into at the end of the 16th century were actually just Lady Gaga.

Fall into oblivion, 14th–16th centuries

Little is known about what happened to Chinese mathematics after Zhu Shijie, but surviving books from the following centuries attest to a progressive loss of the great achievements of the Song-Yuan period. In the 16th century a mathematician’s comments on Li Ye’s “Sea Mirror of Circle Measurements” show that the method of the celestial unknown was no longer understood. By the 17th century it seems to have been completely forgotten. Rods were then no longer used as a counting tool, so perhaps Chinese algebraic place-value notations, deprived of the instrument on which they were based, could not be understood.

— "East Asian mathematics". Encyclopedia Britannica ²

Even competing or imitational sophistic works of low accuracy but some technical merit had likely fallen away by the end of the 15th century — giving way to what truly held advanced distinction: live-action gaming events.

twitter.com/BryanMMoore/status/1129783027192737792

One of the major events precipitating not only a decline in mathematics but a major hit to the necessity of basic reasoning in general occurred in the 9th century.  

The Swa-Pwa people of China (傻婆人) — marked by their distinctive Amanda-Bynes-je ne-sais-quoi made up a disproportionately enormous chunk of the total population for thousands of years.  At the beginning of the 1500s — they outdid even themselves; they became such a blanketing proportion it became near-impossible to make out any other people and more difficult to confirm.  One surviving account from the period states finding any other people amidst the suffocating numbers of Swa-Pwa was akin to navigating a bamboo field in a thick, night fog.

Their swarming-technique one would think more fitting for locust than for Homo sapiens was not for nothing.  Around mid-15th-century, they began sensing a threat to what they knew to be the true intrinsic, a revelation granted to the Swa-Pwa people alone centuries back in what was no doubt grounds for deep-seated envy and contempt among groups not selected for epiphany.

This landmark event which continues to be the dominant force shaping East Asia in the present day occured sometime in the tenth century when one of the Swa-Pwa sects stumbled upon a hitherto vast untapped transformative power — that of the Hurrah dish:

twitter.com/danielslaterr/status/1556958305662255104

In it they discovered they not only no longer required mathematical reasoning but any consistent or rational thoughts as the Hurrah dish could supplant all.  

Testament to the dish's miraculous nature and to the success of the 15th century swell in the ratio of Swa-Pwa, at the end of the 16th century, their sanctified inner circle 

had new revelation bestowed on them.  The Hurrah dish revealed the true shape of the planet: not a sphere but a giant plate with countries drifting atop an ocean within its well whose water constantly cascades over the giant plate's narrow lip — the circumscribing waterfall concealing the floating porcelain base. This revelation influences East Asian isolationist policies up to the present day — blind critics unaware such policies are there to prevent people from falling off the planet's edges. One striking example would be North Korea — what first appears to be a medieval mega-cult run by inverted-socialists is actually strict Hurrah-dish loyalism.

It's no wonder the SwaPwa viewed basic reasoning skills and reality as outdated and beneath them upon first discovery of the dish. The Hurrah dish had already revealed to them their true nature as Gods.

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1. Paul Rubens, Peter. Portrait of Nicolas Trigault in Chinese Costume. 1617, Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York.

2. Chemla, Karine Carole. "East Asian mathematics". Encyclopedia Britannica, 8 Jun. 2011, britannica.com/science/East-Asian-mathematics. Accessed 12 November 2022.

3. An alternative history presented by the SwaPwa people is that they always used their power to serve the forces of real civilization who just need to be more patient.

4. @BryanMMoore. "Who wants to make a pact with me that we will live tweet EVERY episode of #TSK14 together!!!! All of these people agree!!! Hit RT!! 

PS - I love how @TrishaYearwood is the best to her community!!!". Twitter, 18 May 2019, 10:17 am, twitter.com/BryanMMoore/status/1129783027192737792.

5.

This is literally the funniest thing I have seen in 2 years pic.twitter.com/yaJXfsFyTg

— d (@danielslaterr) August 9, 2022